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The Mind WandersSometimes I feel as if I should be writing a book
Instead of a poem.
Theres too many things to say,
And not enough ink
The alcohol sets in
As the anger seeps out.
The more this happens,
The more cluttered my mind becomes.
The more I have to say.
Three months past and your different than I remember.
The fighting words remain the same,
But this time stronger.
My ears hear more than they would ever ask to know.
A mind has been made up,
To a mindset that will change us all forever.
The timing isnt right.
Theres still years left for this to linger through my mind.
Feeling guilty to even know this honesty,
I let my eyes wander to the ground.
Feeling horrible for your decision,
But knowing its for the best.
Through it all,
I know its just the pills.
A tiny capsule keeping us together.
The only thing you agree upon is the way to loose weight.
Or should I say, loose yourselves
Beneath the perfect image lies a disaster.
But I guess we should all know by
I Love You MomYou say you pictured things differently.
Tears roll down your face as I try to stand strong.
Tripping over your words,
Choking on air.
You tell me that Im leaving too soon.
With each tear that runs, the more I start to break inside.
Wishing my happiness didnt cause you pain.
Trying to figure out some way to make us both happy at the same time.
You say your fine,
But only a fool would believe those words.
The look of pain in your eyes could bring me to my knees.
Ive never seen you break so hard.
But its my turn to tell you,
That everything is fine.
This isnt the end.
Its simply a new beginning.
Your terrified that you wont be in my life anymore,
But Im terrified that youll never truly trust that you always will no matter what.
Theres so many things you wanted to do with me,
That now kill you inside because you fear you cant.
Its never too late mom.
Im here to stay.
The miles may seem long and my voice far away,
But tell m
Running On EmptyMy mind runs hazy
As my soul runs out.
Finding the pieces on the floor,
Trying to fit my heart back together.
Hold them into place until it starts to beat again.
Its obvious theres certain pieces missing.
Never will I be placed together again
Until I learn to create some new.
I cant say I havent tried,
Cause that would be a lie.
I wouldnt have fallen all these times if I hadnt taken a chance.
Wishing I could use this pencil I find myself writing with constantly,
To erase all the things that hurt.
Trying to separate dream from reality.
Sanity from insanity.
Lost within myself,
I find a constant battle.
Looking in each direction to figure out which ones best.
But every direction seems so unclear.
Never will I wear my heart on my sleeve again.
My love has already been branded into my side,
Never to be erased.
Never to be forgotten.
But that never gave me any permanence.
The higher I was, the further I dropped,
And the faster I fell.
Wonder is something
I Dispise.The make up of yourself youve created lately
Is made up of everything I hate.
Despising the words you speak,
The lies you make,
The connections we no longer have.
Turning numb to your composure.
I draw myself the music lines.
I write out all the notes to play.
The sound of the strings from my guitar echo in this room.
Strumming on the strings faster as I think.
Hectic fingers moving quickly to the words pouring from my mouth.
Words of hate.
No words of pity.
Fall to your knees as I have done.
Kick you while your down, I wont.
Laugh as I remise.
Ill lay awake with different thoughts tonight.
Ive missed you all this time,
And now I cant seem to figure out why.
I hate almost everything about you.
Why would I love someone like you?
Miss you now, I dont.
I'm Missing Love.Ive fallen out of love.
Or so I think.
And I have to say,
I didnt think itd hurt this bad.
Maybe hurt is the wrong word to use.
Replace it with empty.
Yeah, thats the perfect word to describe this horrible feeling
that lingers throughout my body.
When my emotions lean towards the worst,
Thats when this feeling hits me hardest.
Looking to run to love.
Speak my words of fear and sadness to the one whose always there.
Knowing itll make everything better just because their beside you.
When you feel you have no one at the end of the day,
Go to love.
Your love is the one whos by your side to hold you.
Well, it seems thats something I can no longer do.
Who knew it could feel so empty?
They say its better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all,
And maybe I agree.
But maybe I dont.
Who likes having something taken away?
Something is missing that I once felt so strong.
Let me feel again.
Maybe thats not
Over And DoneThoughts that fill my brain.
Cries of pain.
Fell to the floor. I cant take any more.
Spoken words turn to lies.
Ive given up, no more tries.
Claiming to be so faithful your words have become too hateful.
Take your steps to turn away
Ill fight to stay astray.
No more late night talks through telephones -
You've created way too many broken bones.
Focus your eyes, theres your true prize.
Another girl comes along,
Ive believed you far too long.
She keeps her steady pace this was never a race.
She knew shed have you in the end,
My heart was there for you to lend.
Fallen girl with broken knees,
Your heart was never mine, Ill give you back the keys.
Trying to crawl to you, I grab the floor.
You turn your back, you shut the door.
Looking to the beautiful skies,
Thats all thats left where are your pretty green eyes?
You continue to lie, I continue to die
Keep asking myself why.
Its been way to painful.
Let's Try To Live On My OwnChanging my ways
The others got me nowhere.
Ive learned from the past.
Ill never do again.
I guess that involves leaving you behind.
Or at least pretending thats what I plan to do.
But little do you know its just a part of my new attempt to get you back.
But wait, thats not what I want?
Maybe I dont even know myself.
Ive spent so much time caught up in you,
Figuring you out,
Ive forgotten about myself.
What is it that I like?
Who am I trying to become?
No. I dont want to become you.
But it looks as if Ive started heading in that direction.
Its time for change.
Time for me to find myself.
Better yet .create myself.
Thats what you say life is about, right?
Done worrying about finding my heart.
This is where I make a new one.
Leave the other behind with you.
Ill pretend it doesnt mean a thing.
My intentions are good, I swear.
Ive just lost my piece of mind.
Memories Too Strong To FadeThey say the more you try to forget,
The more you remember.
But even when I dont try to forget
Youre still my only thought.
Head is screaming now.
Surrounded by people everyday.
Friends that can always make me smile.
A girlfriend who wants nothing more than to be my everything.
Laying in her arms to feel her touch,
But no touch is as sweet as yours.
No matter how many people are around me,
I still feel so alone without you.
The time keeps ticking,
But I feel as if it hasnt moved at all.
Stuck in the past.
Memories flash through my mind,
Like one of those old love movies.
Black and white
But so beautiful.
Trying to pick a favorite memory
But thats just too impossible.
Theres too many memories.
But in each and every one
That beautiful smile of yours still lingers in my eyes.
Youve lied to me.
Left me to fall to my knees.
Broken almost every promise you've ever made to me.
BreakdownHold your blades and contemplate.
Drink up baby.
Drink until you cant remember whats gone wrong.
Kiss as many people as you can.
Get everyone wrapped around your finger as tightly as theyll go.
The world is yours to make a joke of.
But when you find yourself alone at night,
The tears start falling and you dont want to admit it to yourself.
Through all of the things you do to hide the pain,
Its still there.
When no ones around,
You have no one left to show.
Nothing left to pretend.
Reality sets in and you cant breathe.
Its all going on without you.
You take as many people as you can down with you.
But as soon as they find out theyll move on.
Fall to your knees.
Regret and hatred is all you have.
Pain and suffering is what youve convinced yourself youll always have.
Let it go baby.
No more tragedies.
dreamstatecandles shiver, too bright to brave
fading into night and their delicate
pin tip wicks flicker-flash,
dancing in the ocean-tide winds
betraying the presence of
your ghostly breath
you sneak in like a whisper
(you didn’t use to be so quiet)
but now you tip-toe, weaving fog across
mirror edges in my mind and
you are just a moment
past midnight; three (strike.. strike.. strike..)
it is too late to resurrect you
the love-linger of your warm skin
atop mine or revive our
skewed dependent cycle of your
breath in my crushed rose lungs or relive
memories more faded than
darling, it is too late, let me sleep;
I’ll dream of you anyways
YouYou are my why
You are why I want to be here
You are why I love this place
And every day when i see your face
You brighten each day
When you say hello to me
But I cant tell you
How could I tell you
Just what you mean to me
But I cant just leave it be
So I write this for you
With all my sad and sorrow
With hope that tomorrow
My heart wont ache
And my heart wont cry
That this longing will be gone
So my soul can rest once more
But it wont work
Because without you, I'm lost
Without you,I'm like a cold frost
But with you here
I have nothing to fear
And I hate to say it
Because then it's true
I love you.
Beautiful Constellation (The Fault In Our Stars)And this has nothing to do
Though you feel like one to me
And I know nothing is really "okay"
But saying it makes me feel infinite
Belongs to us
Though it never really did
And though you are out of touch
You are mine all the same
I would dare to let death go
Though you say it's inevitable
And I always imagined a perfect ending
But perfect does not exist
And my thoughts are stars I can't fathom into constellations
Because nothing makes sense to me
And even "us" doesn't make sense to me
Death doesn't make sense to me
It's all a broken reverie
But I still love you
You are my angel
Though this is not really about angels
Because angels come and go
You are here with me in this infinite moment
And we will both die shortly
Death is only waiting for us to give up
And we both have nothing
But the fault in our stars
And the fault in our stars
Does not exist
Though some say
That it is hardly ever our fate that makes us underlings,
TouchI don't want to get used to the words you whisper in my ear
Or breathlessly sigh into my mouth
I don't want to get used to the touches that you give me when sun hasn't rised yet
And the touches you give me just before I fall asleep
I want it so my cheeks blush either bright red or turn pale in the cold air
So that my hair flies in the unforgiving wind and passionate fire burns my skin
So that I never forget what your true love feels like
And how much damage your anger can do to my soul
I want you so badly to suprise me like you did that cold morning
Planting kisses like flowers on my cheeks
And carrying me through the colorful meadows for two hours
I don't want to get used to you.
Home is Wherever I'm With YouThumping hearts speaking in the silence of the night,
Your skin tingles under my fingertips
And I feel at home.
Twirling a soft, midnight strand of your hair,
Your gentle eyes illuminate a song of happiness
Breathing my words of devotion in your ear to you and only you,
I feel at home.
Protecting you from the thorns of life,
Convincing you that you shine brighter than any star in God’s sky,
I feel so alive with you by my side.
Invested in you and only you,
I feel the warmth of your body in my embrace,
And I’m home.
A mystery for twoLet me put my words away
I want to express myself
To speak in a a way only you can understand
Just trust me
The more I yell the less you'll hear
And these matters - well, I do believe they ought to be crystal clear
Believe me, silence is the key
Now close your eyes and reach for me
No, do not touch me
Just be close and fell the heat
Count the tic-tac of my irregular heartbeat
Really, words tend to get in the way
I say this, you think that - we go separate ways
Let's keep things simple
I'll avoid your gaze
You're too amazing for me to keep up
Call me shy or call me crazy
There's one more secret I'd like to share with you
I hope I made you feel like you're special
If you focus you'll find a connection
If you don't trust me or don't believe me, you will see
These things I've never said or did - for you from me
Sunlight VS. ShadowsDarling,
I love you
I love the way you laugh
When I say something funny without trying
The way you smile
Although you don't do that often
The way you try to romance me
With those silly, adorable pickup lines
You always seem to make me blush
You always have a way to make me smile
But now you have her...
Another girl you really like
Another sun to light up your world
Is her sunlight brighter than mine?
Is my light fading on you?
But I'm happy for you
I really am...
I'm glad you have someone to make you smile
I'm happy someone can make you laugh more than I do
I wish you good luck
I'll wish upon that shooting star
For you to have a better life
With that girl who will actually be there for you
I'm better sinking into the shadows
Shall I just move on?
Shall I fade into the night?
Where I will be hidden forever?
It's not like I have a chance
Or anyone else
So please, my love
Will you answer these questions for me?
Shall I leave or stay?
Shall I move on with the feelings
let us be that kindlet me giggle under your nose kisses and
curl up next to you under an unimaginably cozy blanket and
watch your sweet face slowly submit to slumber under the blue TV glow
like a child
let me tug on your clothes and tell you i don't like them, so take them off
and kiss hard and love with dreamy eyes like you're the first star i've ever seen in my life
and decide it's okay that i have roots here, i love Oregon and i never take big chances or challenge myself
like the teenager i am
let us bat eyes at each other down the aisle
and cherish a home finally without other people
and know it's okay that there are hard times, we are stronger than doubts
like the man and woman we aren't yet
let our love make us old and make us beautiful
and our flame only dim by age and
say goodbye in the in the morning when i go to the market
but really mean goodbye when i hear you exhale for the last time
like the ones who never gave up
Bring You BackI wish I could bring you back,
Show you all the good in life -
Everything you forgot to live for.
Take a walk with me,
Ill let you see everything thats gone on.
Show you whats happened to the person you took your life for.
Oh, if you only knew the kind of person she has turned into.
Lies on top of mind games,
Smiles hiding the evil to her plans,
Someone who will never stop breaking hearts.
If you only knew then she wasnt worth it.
I understand everything you felt.
Every question that lingered in your mind.
The need to die was strong, I know.
If only I could have grabbed your hand before you jumped.
I sit here and wonder who youd be today.
Successful, Im sure.
Maybe you would be a doctor,
Allowing people to stay another day,.
Saving those who try to take their lives,
Instead of taking your own.
Id do anything for you to live again.
Look at the things shes done.
See the person she is with right now.
Read the words they ha
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Bluefley has a gallery filled with artwork that whisks you off in to a Sci-fi daydream, and keeps you captivated for hours. Marc has been a member of our community for over a decade and has achieved nothing but success with his astounding commitment to interacting with the community, sharing a prolific amount of video tutorials and generally being an all round rockstar deviant. It is no joke that we are absolutely delighted to award the Deviousness Award for April 2014 to ... Read More